There’s a reason I don’t keep bread in the house

I got a loaf of bread for my mom and had it in my house for more than 46 seconds and so I opened it and made a fried egg sandwich. I’d just eat the whole damn thing if left to my own devices. Peanut butter, egg salad, just plain bread. I’ll eat the damn thing in less than a day.

It was sooooo good.

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