I have tasted a peach

You may, if you are squeamish, not want to read this. I found a ripe peach on my tree. It seems there are too many peaches for the squirrels to eat and when I saw this ripe looking and softish-feeling peach I picked it and ran screaming (but in a masculine way) immediately into the house. But then, as I went to wash it (not that I felt it needed it but out of habit) I saw what I assumed to be evidence of the entrance of some sort of insect.

The scream that escaped my lips when I cut it open was considerably less masculine. As it turns out that hole was not made by an insect entering the fruit but by its exit. What ever was in there was gone (thank Christ) and I was able, in fact, to actually locate the tiny pin prick entrance.

Sometimes I can be braver than I appear, like last night when I opened my bedroom window at midnight. leaned out and yelled at the people playing really loud music and dancing in the street below my window, of course I did not sleep for 4 hours afterwards as I attempted to calm myself down, but I have digressed.

I cut away any bad looking bits of the peach and ate the remains. It was delicious.

My heart goes out

to those millions of women (and it was mostly women) who had to get all the summer’s produce into some semblance of preservation. Pickling in the summer is a bitch. How did they do it? Seriously. You just have to. There’s nothing to be done about it. When produce is ready it needs putting up.

I had the luscious convenience of air conditioning and, still, pickling took a lot of effort. It was blazing hot and I was sweating more than one might comfortably want to be sweating around food prep (keep that in mind when you’re eating in a restaurant in the summer). And I cannot just keep all the summer’s batch of cucumbers until I have the entire crop and then pickle them all at once. They need to be pickled as they come along. My cucumbers, there are several varieties, are coming in hither and tither. Peppers, cucumbers, green beans. Peaches if I ever get any—they are very near to ripe and it seems the squirrels cannot eat them all despite their best efforts so I will have to put them up as well. I don’t think you pickle them (a quick peek at the google tells me I can). Oh god.

Peaches or pretty

Which would you choose? The tulle seems to be very effective against the squirrels. It isn’t pretty but there have been no recent forays into either the peach or olive tree that I have seen. And for some reason that olive tree was a fun place for them to whizz up and down in their cute little whizzing way they do. They were constantly in it. I fucking hate them.

In the meantime it looks like a bridal party came whizzing through here and had a situation. I hope there’s cake.

The battle rages on

Probably a lot of history buffs are going to always remember the Great Squirrel Battle of 2021. And possibly the attendant Potato Bug skirmish.

The little nails I put on the top of the fence are def not working but I have been told that squirrels hate tulle (just watch my squirrels will looooove it). So I ordered a bolt. The squirrels have already begun denuding my peach tree. The peaches are not bigger than my little fingernail but the ground under the tree is littered with the ones that get knocked off while they’re frisking about noshing on the other baby peaches. So I’ve started with a base of wadded up tulle and one branch enrobed. I will see if this keeps them out. I can see that they would really not know how to deal with this but on the other hand squirrels aren’t as stupid as I wish they were.

And in my experience where there are potato plants, potato beetles are not far behind. You can put something called floating row covers on them, but I think tulle will do the trick and it’s a lot cheaper.

As an added plus I can wrap myself in oceans of it and dance around the house. Shades drawn of course.

Produce news: Peaches

Well you can put your fucking crumpets in the freezer. There’s not going to be golden luscious homemade peach preserves to slather onto them. The recent rain knocked all but 7 or 8 peaches off the tree. And the goddam squirrels will get those I am sure. Or the robins. Or more rain.

I will need to cage these somehow. The mind reels.


There are no apples on my apple trees but, for the moment, I got peaches. And lots of them. The peach tree in bloom was glorious but I thought that in it’s first year nothing would materialize. there were about 8 blooms on the apple tree and they all just fell off. Maybe the crappy weather had something to do with that.

I’m already planning my cute containers of peach preserves I’m giving out at Christmas.