Desperate times; desperate measures

I am making my own butter (more on that later). I told my sister this and she said she was going to make her own toilet paper. Can’t wait for her to get back to me on that front. I hope she’s got a good tweezer. Anyway, ima do her one better. I’m making my own soap. Well, I’m not really making soap, it’s already made.

I’m using the leftover soap from years and years of collecting those little soap ends. Usually I just stick the little now-too-small-to-efficiently-function-for-me bar of soap onto the new bar and hope they stick together. Occasionally when the soap has the wrong shape for this to happen I save the little old piece. So, now, having little else to do except eat, I decided to do what I’ve been wanting to do for years. I put them all in a plastic container, filled that with water, waited for them to soften and then squished them together with the lid and set a jar filled with water onto the mess to keep it squashed down until it dried into a block.

In retrospect, I should have looked at YouTube to see if this is something that is feasible. I still haven’t done that and since I’m in the thick of things there’s little I can do at this point. After it had hardened into something coherent (which is more than I can say for myself) I sliced it into bars. Hmph, I thought smugly, that’ll do, preparing to show them triumphantly to my naysayers (the Royal Indian Mounted Police Force to name a name). That was until they dried a little more and all the various pieces pulled apart.

So I threw the chunks into the food processor and made something that looked not unlike bleu cheese crumbles but smelt somewhat more refreshing. I packed these into one of the various plastic containers I’ve saved and waited for this to solidify and then popped them into the oven at 100 degrees to harden them.

You may want to bring your own soap if you’re stopping over (4 months from now). I know I have a roll of toilet paper tucked into my glove compartment in case I stop at my sister’s.

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